Crazy in Love
by Ellixer
Summary: Gabrielle's life after the series Finale.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Crazy in Love

Rating: M

Author: Ellixer

Pairing: X/G

Disclaimer: Characters and show are owned by Universal and others. The story is mine. I make nothing.

Note: Events after the series finale.

Crazy in Love

'Xena, you know people think I'm crazy.'

'So?'

'So how come you can touch me? I could be crazy, I mean it's quite possible.'

'For my sacrifices, they granted me one request.' She pauses. 'I could leave if…..'

'I'd rather stay crazy.' I'm going home and despite having died, Xena has yet to leave my side. I can see her, feel her, hear her; but I am the only one. People just see this little blonde talking to herself and hugging air. I should probably try not to do that in public.

'Are you sure?' She asks softly, her hand caressing my face. My eyes close a moment.

'If feeling you and kissing you means I'm crazy, then I want to be as crazy as possible.'

'But maybe you could move on.' I can't help it, I begin to cry.

'I don't want to move on.' My head drops as I try to fight the surge of emotions. 'Besides you promised.' I regain my composure, giving her a small smile. She's shaking her head, tears forming in her eyes. 'If it were you, wouldn't you want this?'

'Anything to see you.' I lean into her hand as it cups my cheek.

'Then I want you with me forever.' She shakes her head as tears spill over. I reach up and try to wipe them away. I don't understand it; I feel everything as if she was really here, her tears are wet, her kisses soft. 'Will you stay with me even when I'm old and wrinkly?' I laugh a little.

'I'll love you even more.'

'You shouldn't lie Xena.' I grin at her. Weirder things have happened, so why not believe this? I still feel lost though. 'What should I do now?'

'Do what makes you happy.'

'You make me happy.' She sighs, and I have a feeling she is regretting the request she made, whatever that entailed.

'I can't tell you what to do.'

'That's not helpful.'

'I'm so sorry baby.' Xena only calls me baby or sweetheart when she is really upset, so I know now is one of those times. She pulls me into a hug, she actually feels warm against me. I breathe her smell in; it hasn't changed. I can't decide if this is heaven or a form of torture.

'What do I tell Eve?' She pulls away again.

'The truth.' I'm not sure how to tell someone that their mother is dead, but that she still travels with me. Oh and I'm the only one that can see her.

'I think that's more complicated than you think.'

'Eve will understand.' She takes my hands in hers, giving them a light squeeze.

'I'll send for her, have her meet us in Amphipolis.' Us? No more like me, I, no plural here.

'Why Amphipolis?' Her eyebrow cocks up.

'Because that's where I'm going.' There are questions waiting to be asked, but she doesn't push. I know she'll ask me later. 'Can we just lie down?' She nods at me, pulling me close as we lay back against the furs. I think every morning I will wake up praying that it's not a dream that she really is with me; even if not in human form.


	2. Chapter 2

Crazy 2

'Shhh.' She whispers and taps her ear. I take a deep breath and try to focus. It's barely audible, but I can hear slight movement in the leaves. I focus harder; it's to the left a few hundred yards. I step lightly avoiding anything that will cause noise, and creep close, watching as a rabbit nibbles on vegetation. My eyes focus as I bring my bow and arrow up. My mind clears, my breathe stops, my arm pulls back. The arrow looses, flying straight for its target. An hour of stalking through the trees, and seconds to kill.

'You're getting good.' She grins at me, pleased with herself. I just shake my head and grab the rabbit, thanking it for its life that it gave. It's big and fat, probably preparing for winter. We walk back down the game trail towards the yurt. I didn't want to stay in the actual town of Amphipolis, so I chose the outskirts hidden in the woods. No one bothers me, and there is no foot traffic.

We walk for half an hour, playing the game where I guess who she is. We used to do this all the time, helping the hours tick by faster. She always finds a way to cheat though. We step into the small clearing that I've acquired as my own. Eve is kneeling, eyes closed praying.

'Eve!' I wasn't expecting her. At least not this soon. Her eyes pop open and her head turns. She smiles as she gets up and comes running towards me. We embrace in a long hug.

'Where's mother.' Eve asks as she pulls away. She's smiling and I'm about to change that. Sighing I look away for a moment, trying to figure out how to say it.

'She didn't make it back from Japa.' Her face falls, a look of disbelief appears.

'What do you mean?' Out of the corner of my eye I see Xena move towards her daughter, wanting to comfort her but unable.

'She sacrificed herself for the greater good.' Tears begin to form in Eve's eyes. She looks so much like her mother. 'But her spirit is here.' Her face becomes serious as she closes her eyes, looking like she's concentrating.

'I can feel her.' Her eyes open as she begins to look around as if she'll see her mother.

'I can see her and talk to her.' A calmness overcomes Eve, and she reaches out grasping my hands in hers.

'That's a blessing.' She's beginning to smile again. 'I know she's happy then.' I don't know what to say, I'd rather have her here in body as well. I smile sadly, holding back my tears.

'She was the only family you had, I'm sorry.' Her faces twists in confusion.

'I still have you.' The tears come quickly, I put a hand up to my mouth to hold back the sobs.

'I've always loved you like a daughter. I didn't….I didn't think that…' Eve pulls me back into a hug. I can see Xena standing behind her, smiling and crying at the same time. We stand there a moment, caught in the emotional turbulence of the situation. Finally our tears slow, and we are calm enough to talk again. 'Come on, we have a lot to talk about.' I grab her hand and lead her to the yurt.

There is a stunned silence when I finish recalling the events of Japa to Eve. I know with her faith, she'll be able to see it as a good thing. I still can't, or maybe I just don't want to. Xena is sitting next to me, holding my hand but remaining quiet.

'So it's like she's really here, but only you can see her?' She's fascinated not appalled at my statements.

'Yes. I can feel her, I can hear her.' I smile a little looking over to Xena, her own sad smile gracing her face.

'So she never leaves you?' I shake my head.

'She told me she was given one request.' I shrug my shoulders. 'I don't understand it either.'

'No I get it.' Eve's eyes shine, her lips form a huge smile. 'I get it.' I don't know what she gets, but at least it makes her feel better. She stands up, looking down at me. 'I have some praying to do.' She smiles as she walks out.

'Well that went better than I thought it would.' I look to Xena and she squeezes my hand.

'I can hear her.' Xena smiles at me.

'What do you mean?'

'She's talking to me, in her prayers.' She cocks her head up, trying to concentrate.

'She has an infinite amount of faith.' I envy her sometimes. She has that which I had searched for, then lost. Xena looks at me.

'Eve's your daughter too.' She whispers. Sure I love her, but I never thought I meant more to her than a friend. 'She looks up to you.' I laugh a little.

'I'm not sure why she would.' She pulls my face in close, her lips graze mine. Our foreheads rest against one another.

'How could she not.' Her hand rubs my cheek, and it feels warm.

'I love you.' It hurts to say, but I mean it. She doesn't need to say it, she wouldn't be here if she didn't love me. 'Come on, I better cook that rabbit.' I take her hand pulling her up with me. 'Go, be by your daughter.' I slap her butt playfully. She hates when I do that. Her eyes narrow at me as she walks off. When she's gone, I let out the sigh I've been holding in. Gods I hope I'm not crazy.


	3. Chapter 3

Crazy 3

Life! Your heart is one with your brain  
Emotional or reason, now which one do you obey?  
Life! Somebody callin you insane  
When overwhelmed and blessed, burst in tears of happiness

-Spooks

I shift on the bench under me. Eve is kneeling, praying towards the setting sun. Hues of orange, pink, and purple frame her still figure. Xena is sitting there next to her daughter, just wanting to hold her once more, and whispering in her ear. I don't think Eve can hear her, but she tries to answer her daughters' prayers anyway.

If my parents were alive today, what would they think? There's a chance Lilla won't think I'm insane, but I don't think I'll burden her with that knowledge. I think I'll take the time to work on my scrolls, maybe write some plays. I could go back out and fight the good fight, but it won't be the same. Xena will be by my side but unable to do anything. I dip my quill in ink and turn back to the blank parchment in my hands.

_I write no more of battles but of the warrior who so gallantly gave her life for the souls of others. Her quest has finished, but all is not gold. I was left behind with a trace of the person I walked beside. Sometimes I think I should seek out every fight, maybe I'll be granted an end. But I was given a gift of sight and sound. _

_I've written of the many times the God's have tried to separate us, but our love has always transcended and overcome any and all attempts. This time they have succeeded in separating us in body, but the soul is stronger than any God's power._

_So while I may be crazy, it's crazy in love not in mind. She's still here by my side, just as warm as before. We still talk as if there's a future between us, and we love as if we'll never see each other again. Our destiny is tied, our souls intertwined. Even as I age and she does not, she has promised to stay by my side. How many have felt this kind of love? Truthfully I never thought such a thing existed, it was just a tale someone wrote._

I put my quill down and roll up the scroll. The light is fading from the sky and the temperature quickly dropping. I leave the two people I love most to their prayers, heading into the yurt. I stoke the fire back up, and build its flames again. Maybe I should follow Eve, I know Xena would want her safe but I don't know that Eve would appreciate that. Still it's an idea. Eve steps in the yurt, smiling as usual, serene and at peace with her surroundings.

'Can you hear her?' I ask, wondering if Xena's words got lost in the wind.

'I don't really hear her, I feel her answer me. It's hard to explain, but she is talking back.' She wraps her robes tighter around her as she sits on some pillows.

I give her a small smile, happy she has something to hold onto. Xena returns, sitting behind me, arms wrapping around my body. I can see Eve studying me, the way my body language changes, and the expressions that I know cross my face. But she doesn't say anything, doesn't ask anything. I lean back against Xena, feeling her body encompass me.

'Eli told me you could never be separated.' Eve's voice is soft but so full of happiness. Her eyes narrow at me as if she wants to say more. 'Sometimes he speaks to me. He doesn't always answer my questions, but he always gives me purpose.' I do miss Eli, he gave me so much insight and faith that I had been searching for.

'Xena gives me purpose.' I say, almost as if to myself. I can feel the weight of her chin on my shoulder, and hear her breathing in and out. Eve smiles at me and we sit there a moment in silence listening to the crackle of the fire. Eventually Eve turns away from me, laying down and pulling a fur over her body.

'You're not usually this quiet.' Xena's voice pulls me out of the silence induced trance.

'You're usually not this dead.'

'Are you going to always bring that up?'

'Probably.' We're smiling, this back and forth not actually serious. She kisses my cheek and squeezes me tighter.

'Did I tell you that I love you?' She whispers in my ear.

'Not since the sun went down.' I can feel her teeth nip my lobe. I can't imagine what this might look like to others.

'I guess I could say it again.' She's grinning against my neck, the light touch of her lips tickling me, making me giggle.

'Sometimes words are not enough.' I twist my head to steal a kiss from her. They're soft, moist and warm. Part of me has expected things to feel different, but so far it's the same.

'This from a bard?' I turn fully in her arms, my legs over hers facing each other. My hand traces down her cheek and she leans into it.

'Sometimes I can't find words good enough to explain what I feel.' I tuck a bit of hair behind her ear. 'What I feel is beyond explanation.' I'm staring at her lips wanting so badly to feel them on my body.

'I know what you mean.' Her voice is low and throaty. We're coming together slowly, our lips nearly touching. I'm debating whether or not we should stop, Eve is only a few feet away. Seeing or hearing a person have sex with a ghost has to be disturbing. But all thoughts are forgotten when her lips finally meet with mine. We kiss as if it's the last time, an overwhelming need to merge into one.

Our tongues move in long slow motions, neither fighting for control but memorizing the feel. When we finally part, both of us are panting as are foreheads touch. We lay down, wrapped in each other's arms, legs tangled together and looking into the other's eyes. Sometimes I'm deathly afraid to go to sleep for fear she will be gone when I wake.

'I won't leave.' She whispers this promise every night, always sensing my fear. So I look into her eyes until I fall asleep. If she is gone in the morning, at least this is the last thing I will have seen.


	4. Chapter 4

Crazy 4

Note: I feel like this is horribly disappointing

Eve has decided to spread the word here before she sets back out to the west. She said she'd be back, that maybe I could travel with her for a while. I think she says that for my sake, not that she really needs me around. Xena stands watching her walk away, not turning till she can no longer see her daughter. She's missing out on Eve's life again, I'm not sure she can really forgive herself for that.

I don't really think I could follow Eve around, part of me has become so jaded; but I can chronicle her journeys and teachings for future followers of Eli. It's a thought. I watch as Xena slowly walks back to me. Her eyes are downcast but not really sad; more proud and happy than anything else. I know she's proud that Eve has taken a better path in life than she did, no matter how late that path may have started.

'You know this tortures me as much as it does you.' She says as she reaches me, hand coming up to caress my cheek.

'A torture I'll gladly endure.' I smile up at her. 'Dying has made you more sentimental.' She grins back at me.

'I've got nothing else to do.'

'Do you think I should go with her?' My serious tone coming back. Her hand drops from my face as she contemplates.

'I bet she could use a good bard.' She smiles at me.

'Do you want to follow her?' If I go, Xena goes and that means being around her daughter.

'That's not important.' Her eyes harden. 'Don't do it because you think that's what I want.'

'Your ego is as large as ever.' I laugh, trying to make it a joke, but she knows what I'm thinking. She relaxes a little and wraps her arms around me.

'It's your time now. You can do whatever you want.'

'You know what I want.' She smiles sadly at me when I say this. 'I think I'd prefer to live as a crazy hermit who talks to her dead girlfriend.' I laugh, but it's almost bitter.

'Hey, I don't think you're crazy.' She leans down, kissing my lips.

'Well if you are a figment of my imagination you wouldn't think that would you.' My arms wrap around her waist as I rest my head against her chest.

'Well if I'm imaginary then we can have imaginary children, an imaginary dog, oh and an imaginary babysitter.' She keeps rambling on. 'Imaginary pigs, an imaginary castle…' I slap her arm playfully.

'Stop it.' She shrugs, turning away. 'Are you sure?' I ask.

'I had my time.' She turns with a sad smile. 'Fate has it worked out already.' I can't decide if I should go with Eve or not, but she won't be back for days so I don't need to think about it too much. I walk to a patch of grass and lay down. The day is nice and cool, the sun warming my face.

'So how many imaginary children do you want?'

'Five.' I look at her in disbelief.

'You do realize you would have to take care of them?' She's taken aback.

'You don't think Xena Warrior Princess can handle five imaginary children?'

'No.' I grin at her.

'You're probably right.' Her shoulders slump in mock disappointment. 'You know you deserve one.' She says after a while.

'Deserve what?' My eyes are closed; I'm enjoying the warmth of the sun.

'A family.' My eyes pop open as I sit up.

'I have a family.'

'You know what I mean.' She looks away. I grasp her chin, forcing her to look at me.

'I have a family.' This time I say it with as much conviction as possible. 'I have everything I want. Well mostly..' I kiss her lips to make the point. 'So shut up.' I lean my head on her shoulder.

'So what are you going to do?'

'I've been thinking of a play I could write.' Wouldn't it be funny if I can manage to be a famous playwright? I wouldn't be crazy anymore, I'd be eccentric.

'What about?'

'It's an epic tale of love and loss.'

'Sounds like a good idea.' I can hear the grin in her voice


End file.
